Comments on: Dongtini — Episode 118

By: Simone

Simone — Wed, 07 Jan 2015 20:51:40 +0000

Thank you, John! Sorry, your comment got lost amidst a shitload of spam! Glad we’ve helped you through Christmas! It sucks for us too! Good luck with extricating from Christendom, if that’s what you think you need! You’ve got my support.

By: John

John — Sat, 27 Dec 2014 18:15:30 +0000

Thoroughly enjoyed listening to your podcasts…I’m based in the UK here.
They’ve helped me get through this month and the Christmas period!

I’m from an evangelical background. I’ve been disillusioned by it all for a while
but somehow it’s hard to extricate myself from Christendom!

By: Doctor Strib

Doctor Strib — Sat, 06 Dec 2014 19:58:12 +0000

Simone! You wouldn’t happen to be visiting Kauai on your Hawaii trip would you? I have a DongTiki for you.

Stephy! Check your DongMail! Also, I am working on a Madonna and DongChild painting for you today

By: Stephy

Stephy — Tue, 02 Dec 2014 18:40:39 +0000

Not you guys’ fault, I just feel so stuck, like “what’s the solution?” Ahh! I’m just raw lately because I’m probably going to have to shut down SCCL because of this stuff.

By: Stephy

Stephy — Tue, 02 Dec 2014 18:32:10 +0000

Okay, I’m just crying.

By: Simone

Simone — Tue, 02 Dec 2014 18:29:39 +0000

Both guys who wrote in were definitely condescending too, but Andrew WK is the authority figure in this situation so it has a very different vibe and responsibility. Those guys were speaking for themselves, AWK is speaking TO all of us who may have similar feelings to the question askers who were not very kind. “Fuck that guy” might not be the solution, but I know you come from a place where feelings were shut down so I know you don’t want that to happen to others. If talking directly with someone, saying “fuck you” is pointless, but I think it’s reasonable when the person is not participating as an expression of frustration which is a perfectly valid response to how this made some of us feel.

By: Stephy

Stephy — Tue, 02 Dec 2014 18:20:16 +0000

I feel that the guy who wrote in came off as very smug and condescending as well. And I can see how Andrew did after you guys explained how. I don’t think either side wins if the posture is “fuck that guy” instead of trying to understand how each side is speaking out of their story of pain and hurt. I’m so discouraged right now that I am not sure I’ll be able to keep talking about this, I am just a crying mess about this subject lately. Feels hopeless that there will ever be understanding and bridge-building. Does anyone else feel that way?

(I just talked to Eugene at length about my difficulties with the “fuck that guy” thing because I want to say the same thing so often, but I think what I mean is “fuck their lack of curiosity about another viewpoint.” But I feel that the remedy for that is more curiosity. I don’t want to bust on Eugene for saying it, I just wonder if what we really mean underneath it is “fuck your lack of empathy,” which both sides seem to feel about the other side – that there is a lack of empathy. I guess my question is, how do we foster empathy and curiosity? And I’m at my wits’ end trying to do that with SCCL for the past 6 years and so I’m in a raw place with all this. Ahh!)

By: Simone

Simone — Tue, 02 Dec 2014 17:49:37 +0000

I think he wasn’t consciously feeling superior much in the way men don’t understand their gender privilege. Being part of the group he was addressing, it definitely felt condescending. I’m sure it wasn’t his intention, but it really felt like he was explaining traits and viewpoints that we couldn’t possibly understand while packing it up in a way that doesn’t work for us, then walking away like “My work here is done”. It was truly maddening and insulting and really didn’t address either question and instead veered off into what felt like an excuse to explain spirituality to cold-hearted atheists who couldn’t possibly understand these concepts. It felt very patronising.

By: Stephy

Stephy — Tue, 02 Dec 2014 17:21:58 +0000

Thank you so much!!

By: Stephy

Stephy — Tue, 02 Dec 2014 17:21:37 +0000

I think it’s an assumption that he is feeling superior with is highly evolved sense of spirituality. I think there’s room to see how both sides are operating from their story and speaking from their particular hurts. I feel really uncomfortable with the “fuck that guy” sentiment about either Andrew or the person asking the question.